As a senior, I have had some time to reflect on my Stanford experience. Remembering the difficult times, the lessons, the highlights, and trying to take in all the things still in store during this final year. In reflection, I wanted to share some reminders that helped me during my frosh year and beyond. As a frosh, I often thought everyone else had friend groups, and that nobody really liked me. I felt very insecure and lonely. Here are some things that helped me navigate these feelings.
One Day at a Time
Starting college can feel like stepping into a new world, filled with excitement and uncertainty. During my freshman year at Stanford, I struggled with homesickness and the urge to compare my new experiences to my past. It often felt like everyone else had their friend groups locked in, leaving me feeling isolated. However, as I embraced the power of being present and let go of comparisons, each day became a new adventure filled with its own joys. By practicing patience and keeping my heart open, I forged meaningful friendships that didn't replicate my past but offered their unique happiness. In this article, I want to share the invaluable lessons about patience, openness, and presence that can help each of us flourish on our journeys.
Be Present/Let Go of Comparison
Oftentimes during my freshman year, I found myself comparing my new environment and friendships to back home. This often brought me sadness, homesickness, and a feeling of loneliness. I felt like my friendships weren’t the same, that nobody liked me, and everyone else seemed to have friend groups that I just couldn’t find. But as I went along my Stanford journey, I was reminded of the power of being present and letting go of thoughts of comparison. This opened up every day to become an adventure; life at Stanford didn’t have to look just like my life at home, but I could still find joy and be the person I wanted to be. By being present, I opened myself up to opportunities to connect, grow, and have adventures that I wouldn’t have experienced if I'd let myself get stuck in comparing myself to the past.
Be Patient
On the same note of feeling like everyone else had friends and I didn’t, I realized that sometimes it takes time to find the people you really connect with. But by being patient and staying true to myself, I began to find communities and people who uplifted me and helped me feel more connected. I may not have found large friend groups, but I found meaningful friendships that were genuine and uplifting, and realized, really, sometimes all you need is one good friend.
Keep Your Heart Open
Stay open to new connections and experiences. Had I just given up and stopped trying to make a home for myself here, I would’ve never gotten to experience the friendships and joy I have now. Even now, as a senior, I am still making new friends, going to events all by myself, and trying new things.
So this is your reminder to take it one day at a time with an open heart. These lessons have helped shape my Stanford experience for the better, leaving me feeling more connected and joyful.
Written by: Cherrial Odell, Class of 2026
Resources
Stanford Resources
- Mental Health Resources at Stanford: Your go-to hub for navigating the many mental health and well-being resources at Stanford.
- Community & Belonging at Stanford: Here's where you can learn about our vibrant student communities and ways Student Affairs supports them.
- Wellness Buddies: A community sprouted from one student's experience of loneliness at Stanford. Find spaces where people can connect, reflect, and pursue well-being together.