When things keep going wrong despite our best efforts, what can we do? DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) offers some solutions. In this month’s tip, we will discover some acronyms that can help us come to peace with our situation and build our tolerance for distress.
Radical Acceptance
It can be really difficult to feel in control when things out of your control seem to be taking space more than you would like. Depending on the external stressors, such as politics or personal drama, it can make us feel powerless. Well, what if we just tried to accept it? Now, this is not about something where you have control. Instead, radical acceptance asks us to observe the situation, and without judgement of ourselves, accept it for what it is. It might seem silly, but think about it- can you as an individual control who is in office, or how someone else reacts? No; and that is okay! Think if constantly ruminating over something you cannot control is helpful; it is usually not. If you are still having trouble with accepting, then let’s try something more easy first.
But first, TIPP!
This skill can be very helpful for when we feel we cannot accept a current situation or are too stressed to think clearly. TIPP stands for Temperature, I stands for intensive exercise, P stands for paced breathing, and the last P stands for progressive muscle relaxation.
For temperature, try an ice pack on your face or a cold shower.
For intensive exercise, try a HIIT (high intensity interval training) or a quick jog around the block.
For paced breathing, look up a box breathing video or try a guided meditation with breathing exercises.
For progressive muscle relaxation, clench and unclench your fists or look up a video focusing on your whole body progressively relaxing.
The point of this exercise is to help distract us and to give our body a quick reset. It is okay if you do not want to accept some situations, especially where you feel an injustice has happened. But, it is important to remember our own well being when interacting with the world. It is okay to feel frustrated, but you still deserve to thrive! So, next time you are feeling a little too overwhelmed to radically accept an early class, try just one of the TIPP letters to help. At the very least, you will have distracted your brain for a couple of minutes. At the very best, you have added a new coping skill to your tool box, and are building your tolerance to distress.
Written by: Chavi Coy, Class of 2026
Resources
Stanford Resources
- Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS): CAPS providers are ready to support your mental health. The process is fluid and meant to respond to your individual needs.
- Well-Being Coaching: Work with a supportive partner to design your own vision for well-being. Figure out what you want and need at this phase in your life. Move through uncertainty with a trusted guide. Sign Up for a Coaching Session Here
Additional Resources
- TIPP Skills from NAU: This sheet gives concrete and easy examples on how to ground yourself using TIPP while simplifying it even more. It is easy to read and organized and great for beginners.