Navigating Loneliness

Have you ever found yourself feeling disconnected and lonely even when you are surrounded by people? Have you spent nights feeling out of place and alone? Loneliness is often not talked about enough for how common of an experience it is, especially when entering a new environment like college where you are beginning to build a new life for yourself. Here’s some tips on navigating loneliness at Stanford.

Navigating Feelings of Loneliness

Loneliness is a common, but often unspoken challenge that many college students face. Transitioning to a new environment, adjusting to academic demands, and being away from familiar support systems can all contribute to feelings of loneliness. 

Here are some tips on how to navigate those feelings:

Acknowledge Your Feelings

Give space to loneliness, recognizing and accepting that loneliness is a very human experience and quite common in college. You are not alone in feeling this way, and once you recognize that, you can take steps towards addressing the feelings.

Get Involved

Engaging in campus activities is one of the best ways to meet new people and create meaningful connections. Join organizations or clubs that match your interests. Take advantage of campus events and workshops that are designed to bring students together. 

Take Small Social Risks

Sometimes when you are feeling lonely — even though it is counter-intuitive — some deal with it through isolation. While alone time isn’t bad, sometimes loneliness calls for a dose of human connection. Try introducing yourself to classmates and asking them if they want to study or even reaching out to that one person you thought was really cool. Pushing yourself to engage in small social interactions can help build confidence and new connections.

Create Spaces That Feel Good to You

If you're finding it hard to connect through existing groups, try creating spaces that align with your interests. Invite classmates or people you’ve enjoyed interacting with to join you in activities you love, whether it's a casual coffee meetup, a walk around campus, or a game night. Building connections around shared activities can help foster a comfortable and enjoyable environment, while giving you control over the social dynamics.

Evaluate the Narratives You Are Telling Yourself

Loneliness can often bring feelings of self-doubt and insecurity. You might start believing that you’re not likable, that others are excluding you, or that you're somehow inadequate. Take a moment to recognize these narratives and challenge them. Instead of assuming others aren’t interested in you, remind yourself that everyone is adjusting to new surroundings, and they might be feeling the same way. Reframing these thoughts can empower you to approach social situations with more confidence.

Practice Self-Compassion

Remember that building connections takes time. Be patient with yourself and understand that it’s okay to feel lonely while adjusting to a new environment. Focus on your well-being and take things one step at a time.

Remember you are not alone and be patient with the journey. Find the things that make you feel full and know that if you ever need a friend, consider joining a group like Wellness Buddies. I run this group on campus and would love for you to join our community!

Written by: Cherrial Odell, Class of 2025

Resources

Stanford Resources

• Mental Health Resources at Stanford: Your go-to hub for navigating the many mental health and well-being resources at Stanford.
• The Bridge Peer Counseling Center: Seek support from your peers through the Bridge Peer Counseling Center. These trained students can offer a listening ear and/or advice on how to prepare for exams, manage stress and test anxiety, and more!
• Wellness Buddies: a community sprouted from one person’s experience of loneliness at Stanford that creates spaces where people can connect, reflect, and pursue well-being together. 
• Community and Belonging at Stanford: Explore the vibrant student communities on campus!